I entered the Twilight Zone on May 31st, 2008. I knew I was in another dimension when everything I thought I knew about the Democratic Party became a myth. I grew up in a Roman Catholic, John Kennedy worshipping kind of family. You probably have seen our family or one like it, you know that large family you used to sit next to in a small Catholic church in the sixties where “boys were boys” and girls better be good. Yeah, that was us. I grew up with ten brothers and three sisters although one was in memory only as she died when she was an infant. My parents were staunch Democrats. Some of my older brothers became Republicans as adults but it was only whispered about in the family. My mom never really thought it to be true until one of her grandchildren received a scholarship from the Republican Party. Ouch, that kind of hurt. I, being the youngest of this family, and firmly devoted to the morality code of my parents, never considered myself to be anything but a Democrat. My parents have since passed away but I often wonder what they would have thought about the 2008 election. We lived and breathed politics from the time I was a young girl so for me knowing about all things political was like being able to ride a bike.
During the 2008 primary I followed the candidates quite well. In the summer of 2007 I heard Barack Obama on the National Education Association website as he had attended the annual conference along with the other Democrats and one Republican, Mike Huckabee. I watched all of their videos even Mike’s. Barack spoke the “death words” for every teacher that believes in their union, “merit pay”. I knew right then that he was more “Republican” than Democrat and I wouldn’t be voting for him. Even though I had been very impressed with his speech during the 2004 convention, I just figured he wasn’t Democratic enough to warrant my vote.
As the primary moved on I gravitated towards John Edwards. It seemed like John was saying all of the things that I believed in and he emphasized the issues relating to the poor. Talking about the poor rarely gets you votes because the poor don’t necessarily vote and everyone else has discovered that the “vote getter” is to talk about the “middle class”. John had the message that resonated with me from health care to the economy. Unfortunately, his private life was too complicated for a real go at a political life. Regardless of the failings of John Edwards, his message was and still is the message that resonates with me. I see the poor in my classrooms sitting next to students that have plenty. I care for all of them but I want to help the poor realize that they must dream just like the wealthy always have had the opportunity to do so.
After John got out of the race I had to make a decision. I must admit I couldn’t see myself ever getting past the merit pay issue. However, I had many questions about Hillary Clinton as well. When John got out of the race I started noticing Hillary picking up the ball from John. She started sounding more and more like John. I was getting interested in her. She came to Indiana about an hour away from where I was in Michigan in early May, so I went to see her. I was amazed by her. She hit all the right notes with me and covered all of the things that I felt were important.
So here we are back to May 31st when I was sucked into the Twilight Zone. I had already voted for John in the Michigan primary and the Democratic Party in their infinite wisdom decided that I, as an Edwards’ supporter, would have cast my vote for Barack Obama. The party awarded my vote and some of Hillary’s votes to Barack because they figured if Barack had been on the ballot those voters would have voted for him. I find it interesting that the Democratic Party thought they could read my mind or read tea leaves or some other nonsense. They didn’t want a revote because they knew that Michigan would vote for Hillary. This was all predetermined and I’ve spent a lot of energy wondering how my beloved party could steal my vote. That is when I realized that I was indeed in the Twilight Zone.
I’ve been stuck here ever since that day. I’m no longer a Democrat because the party I knew just doesn’t really exist any more. It died a slow death over the last forty or fifty years. It was whittled away by special interests, DLC Democrats, DINO’S and southern Democrats that are really Republicans. Today the Democratic Party looks very similar to the Republican Party. They are busy rubbing elbows with corporations that help pay to keep them in office. I was also highly disappointed in my party for the way they allowed women to be treated during the election. Both Hillary Clinton and Sarah Palin were treated with such horrible disrespect by the party and the party faithful that there could be no way possible that I, as a woman, could back such a misogynistic party. So today I’m still stuck and will probably remain stuck in that Twilight Zone, that mysterious place where up is down and down is up. I’ll probably never figure out how my blinders were so rudely pealed off my head but some how I’m glad to be free of a label that represents something I don’t believe in. I discovered in the Twilight Zone that most of us Americans are more alike than we are different. That there are good Democrats and good Republicans and neither party represents us to the best of their abilities. That most of us just want to be able to raise our families in peace and free from worrying about losing our jobs or fighting some stupid war. I figured out that labels are for clothing, people are more alike than different and life in the Twilight Zone has some form of clarity that a lie never holds.
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