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The Stepford Wives and Women Today

  • Posted on April 6, 2010 at 11:16 am

The Stepford Wives Movie With Katherine Ross and Peter Masterson.

For three bucks I purchased the original “Stepford Wives” movie from BigLots.  I had never seen that movie even though it came out in the seventies.  The remade version with Nicole Kidman in my opinion is just about awful!  I always loved Katherine Ross because I thought she was so beautiful so I decided to watch it.  It was interesting watching the old cars and the way people dressed in the seventies but some things stay the same, like the beautiful wife married to the balding, not so great looking, guy.  The movie is largely a statement about the threat women’s liberation is to men and their egos.  In the original movie we don’t end up with a satisfying ending.  In fact we are terrorized in the final thirty minutes of the movie when we realize what’s really happening.  I could feel the terror and confusion that Katherine’s character felt when she was trying to figure out what was happening in the village of Stepford.  Why were these wonderful, engaging, thinking, talented women suddenly turning into robotic images of themselves?  She was in fear of losing herself.  Just as all women secretly fear losing their identity when they marry a man and take his name.  In fact many women today keep their maiden names so they can hold on to their own identity whether it is for work purposes or to continue their heritage.  In the movie the men have formed a club, a club of men that work to make their lives perfect.  Perfect means a wife that is more like a robot than a human, a wife that will think you are a great lover, even if you aren’t, and one that will build you up and make you feel like you are the most important person in the world and can also cook.  The movie assaults men by making them appear to care only about the outward appearance of their women and nothing else.  The men were faced with a decision to rid themselves of their “nagging” wives by “creating” a better model of the imperfect one, one with larger breasts who could dolt after her husband and never challenge him in any way possible.

I used to think we have come along way baby, much like the Virginia Slims commercial from decades ago but now I feel that women have taken a huge step backwards.  It was brought home in the 2008 election when both Hillary Clinton and Sarah Palin were treated with such disrespect by the media, bloggers and even other candidates.  We all remember hearing about Hillary’s “cankles” and Sarah’s beauty was served up to destroy her credibility.  I thought we were living back in the fifties with the attitude toward these two women in politics.  I realize now that given the decades between the Stepford Wives and today nothing has really evolved all that much.  Men are still pigs as witnessed by the behavior of the Tiger, Jesse and Johns of the world.  Women are still trying to please their “man” as witnessed by the women who choose to get involved with these characters.  Most were probably opportunists that used their bodies to get what they thought they wanted, fame, fortune or whatever they were seeking but none of them were looking for self-respect which is foreign all of them.

As a young woman I never wanted to be “dependent” on a man.  I don’t know if it is because I have ten brothers or what.  I just knew that I wanted my own identity.  As an older woman I don’t care one way or the other but I am “man-less”.  I am a divorced woman of many years and I have never been interested in any real relationship since.  In fact I never put myself in situations where I could develop another relationship.  That in itself is probably strange for most people to understand.  However, I do have a strong sense of who I am as a person and what I’m willing to put up with.  In the Stepford Wives movie women with a strong sense of self were eventually beaten by the man and their identities and lives were brutally destroyed.  In real life today women are still putting up with men who don’t appreciate who they really are.  Women are still buying every product they can to please their man whether it be some beauty product, fancy negligees or even implants.  While women do everything they can to attract their man and keep him men continue to think the world revolves around them.  They have been told by their mothers that they are perfect and many of them believe it.  They can be bald, fat, and ugly but women will still appreciate them.  Women on the other hand better stay as they were in their twenties and thirties or they may risk losing their man to the younger version of themselves.

I don’t think women need to be more like men.  I just think it’s time that both sexes were honest with each other about what they need.  Men need to listen to their mates and really appreciate them and women need to see men as more than a paycheck.  Men control the world but need to let women have more involvement in the process.  The world would be a better place if we could use both sides of our brains.  Depending on men for everything only utilizes half of our potential as a race.  If we want peace in this world then we should try putting women of substance in powerful positions.  If we want equality then we should treat each other with respect.  If men love their daughters they should push for equality of the sexes and equality doesn’t mean a woman can choose which implant to get or what dinner to cook.  Equality means making decisions on your own without being pushed into situations you really don’t want to be in.  Equality means not being discriminated against because you are female.  Equality means you will be respected because you are human not because you are a man or a woman.

The Stepford Wives never knew what was happening until it was too late to change the inevitable.  People today, both men and women, can stop this disrespect of women by not feeding the frenzy pushed by the media and not buying into every gadget that is supposed to bring you fulfillment in finding a mate.  Equality will come when we have self respect.  This is not equality.  http://www.pressherald.com/news/Women-march-topless-in-Portland-without-incident.html While women might think acting like a man will get them what they want; it doesn’t.

Source: Gordon Chibroski/Staff Photographer The Portland Press Herald

Tiger Woods or Jesse James, Who Cares?

  • Posted on April 5, 2010 at 4:16 pm

Why is everyone obsessed with Tiger Woods?  I turned on the “news” today to see what’s happening in the world and even though there was an earthquake in California all I could find was “news” on Tiger.  I swear if Tiger sneezes they’ll report on it.  I’m one of those people that just do not care two hoots about Tiger and his sexual exploits.  When I turn on the news I want to hear about politics, issues and what’s happening in the world that will possibly affect my life.  Tiger will never affect my life in any way possible.  Neither will Jesse James, John Edwards or Mark Sanford and yet these are the most important stories to hit the airways in the past year.  I know more about each of these men’s sex lives than I do about the recently passed health care reform bill.  The news media has been taking their cues from the National Inquirer.  The press is lazy and not willing to do the hard work to really report news or even to know what is newsworthy.  Truthfully, men having sex is not news.  It’s been happening for years.  It even happened in the “olden” days.  As much as we think we are above the fray and so over the puritanical nature of our heritage we cannot escape it because the press keeps pressing the flesh of these men in our faces night after night.  In my mind this is done to make money but to also keep our little minds busy with fluff while something really important is going on.  We all know how the shell game works.  The magician distracts us to the point that we have no clue which cup “it” is under.  Today the news is full of distraction to keep our minds off important issues like the war, the economy and health care for all.

It doesn’t matter who is in power, a Republican or a Democrat.  It is only important that we all remain distracted and more interested in these sexual exploits of these men than in real issues.  Heaven forbid if we found out General Electric is profiting off these two wars or will potentially make a bundle off the “green” and “health care” economy push!  http://www.corpwatch.org/section.php?id=19

While G.E. profits their network, NBC, reports the news to us.  We never get the connections G.E. has to many of the issues we face today.  http://www.ge.com/products_services/index.html

As you can see G.E. touches our lives in many ways.  They have their fingers in a lot of proverbial pies including the maker of “news” or what gets served up as news.  Is there any wonder why we keep hearing about Tiger or Jesse?

In Search of the Democrats

  • Posted on February 22, 2010 at 1:02 pm

I was visiting Tennesse Guerilla Women this morning and loved this video post so I’m posting here and giving a link to her site.

http://guerillawomentn.blogspot.com/

This is just what I have been talking about in so many ways but Ted Rall is a lot funnier than I am.  We could do a Where’s Waldo for Democrats. It wouldn’t take too long to find the true Democrats, you know those ones that I remember when I was a kid that actually stood for Democratic principles!  You know I’m home with a snow day.  There is no teaching going on today, so I’m having some fun expressing myself.  This has got to be watched.  Archie Bunker at his finest.  It’s amazing what you can find on Youtube but what is truly amazing is how close to reality this clip is for today.  Am I in a time warp?  This could be now.

This is TV when it was really good.

In other news, the movie “Shutter Island” wins the weekend.  My son says I have to see this movie.  He loved it.  He was a film student at the University of Michigan.  I’ll probably see it when its on DVD but for anyone else it might be worth coughing up the money.  The big news though isn’t Tiger Woods but the Afghanistan civilian deaths.  I’m left wondering why we are still stuck in these two stupid wars when we are supposed to have a DEMOCRATIC president.  Of course the MSM is still talking about Tiger.  I found it interesting this morning when Joe Scarborough from “Morning Joe” on MSNBC said Tiger’s apology was like a third grader acting.  Personally, I don’t give a crap about Tiger.  What I found interesting is the fact that Joe bummed around on his wife and probably should have kept his mouth shut like he usually does about these sexual matters.  He divorced his first wife and couldn’t be faithful to her.  It kind of reminds me of the pot calling the kettle black.  The numbers don’t matter.  What’s the difference if you were unfaithful once or twenty times?  You’re still a dirt bag Joe!  Also Obama is now going to “compromise” on the health care debate.  Isn’t that what we have been doing all along?  Everyone hates John Edwards but John said if you invite the corporations basically to the table they will eat all the food.  That’s not a quote.  It’s just the basic idea of what he said.  John has lost all credibility because of his personal choices but we all should be questioning why that is so.  Does anyone really think our founding fathers were any different than the “cheating” men of today?  The truth is John had a message that nobody (corporations) wanted us (the little people) to hear.  No, we are better served hearing about the sex lives of the rich and famous!  I’ll put it right out there.  I don’t care who is sleeping with who, what, when or wherever?  I do care about who is picking my proverbial pocket and asking me, “Does that feel good?”

Any one out there might not like John but a lot of what he said holds true today.

And what about Obama taking a clue from Edwards?  Is this possible?  Could he use his executive powers to do this?  I would like to see it happen.  I think we all need to remember what was said during the 2008 election.  We might not like the imperfect messenger, John Edwards, but let’s get back to basics and try to get congress and the President to remember what was discussed during the election.

If taking away the health care from Congress would get something done, we should all be screaming, “Do it!”  More than likely though their corporate buddies would buy them new insurance.  And in other news we have the credit card industry.  For months I’ve been getting those little fine printed “exclamation of changes” to my credit card.  You know the ones that say your credit card is going from 8.9% to 29.99 gazillion percent!  Oh, congress has really pushed the credit card industry.   They are really holding their feet to the fire now!  Oh gasp, they have to find other ways to make money now.  Yeah, immediately they raised everyones rates for no reason other than they could and put on many more ways to get a pound of flesh.  Thank you congress and all of you that get money from the credit card industry.  You may want to search through the years at Open Secrets.  It doesn’t matter which party they’re in.  Banks like them both!

http://www.opensecrets.org/industries/summary.php?ind=F03&recipdetail=A&sortorder=U&cycle=2010

I’ll end on a positive note about the news.  The USA hockey team beat Canada and Bodie Miller got a gold!  All is right with the world!

The Morality Test

  • Posted on February 21, 2010 at 1:06 am

Integrity comes in all colors!

Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about spirituality, morality and all of the things that make us the way we are.  Why do we choose the things that we do?  I grew up in a family of fourteen children and I don’t think any of us think exactly alike.  So, what makes us choose certain moral choices?  Tonight I took a morality test on the internet.  I was surprised at the results as they fairly accurately described me.  (The Morality Test) http://www.outofservice.com/morality/results/?morality=73&political=93&social=64&o=8&c=97&e=22&a=87&n=9 I’m a shy person but am also out going in many ways.  I am politically liberal and yet very conservative socially.  I’m kind of close minded in my approach to morality because I see many things in very simple terms.  There isn’t much leeway for me on most issues of morality.  It’s either black or white.  There really aren’t many shades of gray for me.  I don’t spend a lot of time thinking about should I do this or should I do that as there really is just right or wrong for me  Like I said there aren’t any areas of gray.  I don’t consider myself to be a typically closed minded person on most issues.  I’m only closed minded on the issues of what I believe to be right and wrong.

My family is Roman Catholic.  I’m sure this has much to do with my morality code.  I remember talking with a fellow male teacher years ago.  He used to joke about messing around on Saturday night and then going to penance on Sunday.  Maybe it’s different for guys but I never did that.  He loved the Catholic Church because it taught forgiveness.  He always felt that he could go ahead and mess around on Saturday because on Sunday all would be forgiven.  He also talked about it being his “duty” to test the girls.  I never felt that kind of connection with the church.  My connection with the church was more inwardly spiritual.  He knew he would be forgiven for his weaknesses.  I, on the other hand, couldn’t bring myself to be weak and out of control morally because I couldn’t face the consequences that bad behavior might bring.  This may be something to do with the differences between the sexes.  Of course a young woman would and could pay dearly if she messed around on Saturday night as she could get a bad name or an unwanted pregnancy.  None of these things showed for the young men.  Back in my day, the only people that got “bad names” were girls.  It was always “boys will be boys”.  It was almost expected that a guy would “sow his wild oats” but girls were treated differently.

In many ways the Catholic Church treated women differently by classifying them as either virgins or whores.  Back when I lived in Oklahoma I used to attend a mission church.  I lived out in western Oklahoma in Cheyenne.  One time when the priest came out to the mission mass I asked him to stay after as I needed some counseling.  I was alone in Oklahoma with my small child contemplating divorce.  He came out to my home, had dinner with me and we discussed many issues.  It was interesting because he explained to me how the church classified women and how it was difficult for a priest to be alone with a young woman as the priests are taught that there are women out there that are attracted to priests as mates.  He said that they essentially are taught that there are two types of women, the virgin and the whore.  Of course it’s easy to see when you really think about it.  Women are not in real positions of power within the church.  Their role is largely subordinate to the male dominated patriarchy of the church.  Of course we are taught about the virgin birth and the Virgin Mary so Mary’s position is elevated.  She is virtuous.  Mary Magdalene on the other hand was the whore but she redeemed herself so there is always the “hope” of redemption.

Morality of course has many facets.  Sexuality is just one area.  For me morality is more about honesty and integrity than anything else.  We all may know right from wrong but do we all have the integrity to live a life that is virtuous in the area of honesty?  Living a virtuous life doesn’t get anyone an award.  We hear more about the lack of virtue than about people that live with honesty and integrity.  Recently in the news we have been bombarded with the sexual mores of the rich and powerful.  We are seemingly shocked at the behavior of Tiger Woods, John Edwards and Mark Sanford.  We share indignation and are morally outraged at their audacious sexual behavior.  The truth is that none of their lives will ever effect our own situation.  We as a people do not live our lives and learn our morality from politicians, powerful people, sports figures or other wealthy people.  Most of us learn our moral behavior from our parents.  We learn from very little on what is acceptable behavior.  I contend that when people exhibit a lack of moral judgment it is because they either lacked moral guidance as youngsters or they learned how to behave like the Romans.  We have all heard the phrase, “When in Rome, do as the Romans do.”  Now, I don’t mean to say that all politicians cheat on their wives and it is learned behavior that is acceptable to that segment of the population but I think there may be some truth to it.  We all know that sports figures have groupies that follow them around trying to steal some time with them so we shouldn’t be so shocked when someone like Tiger gets his hand caught in the proverbial cookie jar.   I personally think the farther you move away from your roots, whether it is through physical miles or mental miles, the easier it is to go with the “crowd” that you are hanging with and forget about your moral upbringing.  This is why it can be a real eye opener when that young freshman goes off to college.  Suddenly, they are exposed to a whole new world away from the eyes of mom and dad.  It is here that integrity and honesty is truly born.  Will that child go with the flow and follow peer pressure or will they become the person they were meant to be?  Some may take years to discover who they were really meant to be.  It is a part of the learning experience.

Small town living has been pegged as narrow minded, small minded living but in reality it is very difficult to get lost in the crowd when you live in a small town.  When you live in a metropolitan area you can more easily get lost in the crowd and do you own thing.  Small town people talk and they know generally what is going on in their own communities.  I’m not saying that small towns exhibit a higher level of morality than city dwellers.  I’m just saying that people are more apt to know of your personal misgivings in a small town.  Of course the internet has made the whole world a little bit more of a small town.  It amazes me to think that so many people put pictures on the web of their outrageous behavior as though they think a future employer doesn’t know how to use Google.  I can remember going off to college and thinking that small towns were small minded but really my heart is in the small town.  It is here that I feel I can make a moral impact.  I feel if I live an honest life with integrity I become a positive role model for the many children that are raised in chaotic life styles.  I’ve always felt that we should treat each other in the manner that we would want to be treated.  I choose to live my life with integrity.  I do everything I can to treat people with respect and I expect to be treated with respect as well.  It is a lifestyle that may seem boring to many but I live my life with a clear conscience.  I know I can sleep at night knowing I don’t have to fake who I am.  If you are living with a liar whether it be you or your mate you can never really live a virtuous life of integrity because you are always expending negative energy fighting the lies.  I may be old fashioned and virtue may be over rated but I can’t imagine being anyone else.  So sleep well my friends and remember that integrity sleeps with a clear conscience.